Spiritual Bypass in Chronic Illness: Escaping Rather Than Healing

Spirituality can offer profound comfort, meaning, and resilience in the face of chronic illness. It may help individuals find purpose during times of suffering and cultivate inner peace. However, when spiritual beliefs or practices are used to avoid, suppress, or deny the emotional, psychological, or physical challenges of living with illness, this becomes what is known as 'spiritual bypassing'. A term coined by psychologist John Welwood, spiritual bypass refers to the use of spiritual ideas or practices to sidestep unresolved emotional issues, psychological wounds, or uncomfortable realities. In the context of chronic illness, spiritual bypassing can become a subtle, yet damaging, form of denial that inhibits true healing and emotional integration.

The attraction of bypass

Living with a chronic illness frequently involves a constant wave of uncertainty, grief, loss of identity, and at times, overwhelming physical discomfort. When in such a vulnerable state, spiritual ideologies that promise transcendence, control through positive thinking, or instant healing can be extremely tempting. Individuals may cling to beliefs such as “everything happens for a reason,” “I just need to raise my vibration,” or “illness is just an illusion of the ego.” While these statements might provide temporary relief or a sense of control, they can also invalidate real suffering and discourage individuals from engaging with the difficult emotional work necessary for genuine healing and adaptation.

Emotional suppression and denial

One of the most harmful aspects of spiritual bypass in chronic illness is the suppression of difficult emotions such as anger, sadness, fear, or despair. When individuals are told - or tell themselves - that negative emotions are spiritually inferior or energetically toxic, they may learn to suppress their inner turmoil in the name of being spiritual. Over time, this avoidance can lead to increased emotional distress, disconnection from the self, and even worsening mental or physical health. Denying or minimizing the pain of illness in the name of spiritual strength is not a sign of enlightenment; rather, it’s a form of avoidance and emotional numbing.

The burden of blame

Spiritual bypassing also risks placing the burden of illness back onto the person who is suffering. The idea that one’s thoughts, energy, or karma created the illness can lead to shame, guilt, or a sense of personal failure. It implies that if someone is still ill, it's because they have not healed enough spiritually. This mindset not only ignores the complex, multifactorial nature of chronic illness but can also isolate individuals who are already struggling with vulnerability and self-worth. In reality, spirituality that heals does not blame, it observes with compassion.

A more helpful spirituality in iIlness

Authentic spirituality does not require perfection, positivity, or transcendence of the human condition. Rather, it invites a deepened relationship with reality, including the messy, painful parts of life. A more integrated spiritual path encourages presence with suffering, radical honesty, and emotional awareness. It fosters compassion not just for others, but for oneself, especially in moments of weakness, fear, or hopelessness. In chronic illness, this kind of spirituality offers a grounded, nourishing source of strength that supports rather than bypasses emotional truth.

Conclusion

Spiritual bypassing in chronic illness is often unintentional, fueled by the understandable desire to escape suffering. Yet healing requires more than spiritual platitudes or denial of pain; it demands courage to face the full human experience. When spirituality is used to engage with, rather than avoid the emotional and physical realities of chronic illness, it can become a powerful ally, but when it's used as a shield against discomfort, it risks becoming another form of avoidance and disconnection. True healing lies not in bypassing the hard stuff, but in walking through it, with honesty and with open eyes.

If this is something you’ve been affected by, please leave a comment below. If there’s something important you’d like to add, please do so. I'd love to hear from you.

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Dr. Ingela Thuné-Boyle is a licensed Practitioner Health Psychologist and a Doctor in Behavioural Medicine who specializes in improving the quality of life of people struggling with long-term health problems, chronic pain and trauma. She runs a private online (telehealth) practice at www.ingelathuneboyle.com. You can find out more about her background [here], and more about her approach to therapy [here].

📩 Contact: For therapy or other enquiries, you can contact her at info@ingelathuneboyle.com.

Frequently Asked Questions (FAQs)

What does a health psychologist do?

A health psychologist helps people navigate the emotional and psychological impact of chronic health conditions. This includes supporting those who feel pressured to stay positive or use spiritual practices to avoid difficult emotions. Therapy offers an emotionally safe space to explore your experience without minimizing it.

How is spiritual bypass connected to chronic illness or pain?

Spiritual bypass happens when spiritual ideas are used to avoid uncomfortable feelings. For people with chronic illness, this can lead to self-blame, emotional shutdown, or feeling dismissed. Therapy helps you process what’s really happening and develop more compassionate, sustainable coping strategies.

Is online therapy effective if I’ve experienced spiritual bypass or feel overwhelmed?

Often, yes. Online therapy can feel safer and more accessible, especially when symptoms, fatigue, or past dismissive experiences make in-person sessions difficult.

How do I know if therapy is right for me?

If chronic illness feels emotionally heavy, if you’ve been encouraged to stay positive instead of being met with compassion, or if medical or spiritual experiences have left you unsettled, therapy may help you find clarity, support, and emotional safety.

Please note: Advice given in this blog is not meant to take the place of therapy or any other professional advice. The opinions and views offered by the author is not intended to treat or diagnose, nor is it intended to replace the treatment and care that you may be receiving from a licensed physician or mental health provider. The author is not responsible for the outcome or results following their information and advice on this blog.