Dr. Ingela Thuné-Boyle
Health Psychologist
Online Therapy

Spirituality can offer profound comfort, meaning, and resilience in the face of chronic illness. It may help individuals find purpose during times of suffering and cultivate inner peace. However, when spiritual beliefs or practices are used to avoid, suppress, or deny the emotional, psychological, or physical challenges of living with illness, this becomes what is known as 'spiritual bypassing'.

Living with a chronic illness is already a profound challenge. It often requires immense physical endurance, emotional strength, and a support system that understands the unpredictable and often invisible nature of long-term health conditions. But when someone with chronic illness is also in a narcissistic relationship - whether with a partner, parent, or close family member - the burden can become exponentially heavier.

For many living with chronic illness, the word acceptance can feel loaded, even offensive. It may carry the sting of resignation, suggest defeat, or imply a passive tolerance of pain and limitation. To be told to "accept" one’s condition can sound dismissive, especially when that advice comes from those who do not grasp the daily realities of chronic illness. And yet, paradoxically, acceptance is also a cornerstone of psychological flexibility and emotional well-being.

Health psychology is a vital and evolving field that explores how psychological, behavioural, and social factors influence physical health and illness. While traditionally associated with chronic illness, pain management, and health behavior change, health psychology also plays a critical role in addressing trauma and grief. These profoundly human experiences, which are often undetectable by medical tests, significantly impact both mental health and physical well-being.

Experiencing a major bereavement is among the most painful and destabilizing events a person can face. When that loss is traumatic, unexpected, violent, or profoundly significant, it can leave deep psychological scars. For someone already living with a chronic illness, the impact of traumatic grief is compounded, creating a complex intersection of physical vulnerability and emotional devastation. Navigating this dual burden can feel like trying to heal two wounds at once

'Medical trauma' refers to a patient's psychological and physiological response to a negative or traumatic experience in a medical...

The mind-body connection refers to the link between our thoughts, emotions, and behaviours, and our physical health. This relationship is bi

The connection between narcissistic abuse, trauma, and chronic illness conditions, underscores the profound impact of emotional suffering on

Some people with a chronic illness or with distressing physical symptoms may have experienced trauma in their lives, either as a direct result of their illness or at a previous point in their lives. Ongoing childhood abuse, for example, has been shown to be related to ill health in adulthood, where those who experienced a rough childhood are more likely to be diagnosed with a chronic illness later on in life.

Grief is usually associated with a single event such as the death of a loved one. However, in chronic illness, grief is also very prevalent despite the fact that no one has died. It can be an ongoing issue and is usually associated with many types of losses. Despite this, people don't often associate chronic illness with grief but the realization that life will never be what it was, and the future is not what you thought it would be, is a major loss.

Health Related Quality of Life (HRQoL) consists of at least four broad domains that can affect or be affected by one's condition and/or treatment: physical, psychological (including the behavioural), social and spiritual functioning.

When we live with a chronic illness, it's so easy to focus on our shortcomings. So easy to fall back on self-criticism and self-blame. You may feel guilty because you're no longer able to contribute to society in ways you would like to. You may feel embarrassed and ashamed over medical symptoms. You may feel inadequate as a spouse. You may not feel like a good enough parent to your children. You may feel like you let your friends down because you've had to cancel on them more

So, I've recently experienced quite a major bump in my ever present, complicated relationship with illness. My quality of life has been absolute crap despite my best efforts. I've had endless issues where nothing I did appeared to provide any relief whatsoever. This is not new to me. Indeed, I've been here before. Quite a few times actually yet each time, a quiet sense of despair sets in and my future seem very uncertain and bleak. Basically, I start to lose hope.

Refusing to accept symptoms or limitations brought on by chronic illness is a good thing, right? It stops us from giving up, does it not? It drives us on. It makes us fight harder, look for better treatments or, perhaps, even use it to maintain hope for a cure. It's a great motivator! Well, maybe to some degree but in the long-term, all it does is lead you down the path of suffering. Hear me out.

I read an interesting blog article recently. It was written by a woman who felt completely overwhelmed by her illness, especially the chronic pain she was experiencing. Her doctor suggested that she may benefit from a referral to a Pain Rehabilitation Program that included physio therapy, occupational therapy and psychological support, but after years of not having her illness properly validated, her symptoms minimized and often being told, "It's all in your head,"