So, I've recently experienced quite a major bump in my ever present, complicated relationship with illness. My quality of life has been absolute crap despite my best efforts. I've had endless issues where nothing I did appeared to provide any relief whatsoever. This is not new to me. Indeed, I've been here before. Quite a few times actually yet each time, a quiet sense of despair sets in and my future seem very uncertain and bleak. Basically, I start to lose hope.